When do you find yourself nagging more than you'd like with your loved one?

recovery
relationship

#1

In the aftermath of the relapse - which by the way I handled like a pro at the time cool, calm and collected - I’m now finding myself nagging and being a bit mean this week!

When do you find yourself acting out of character with your loved one?


#2

I’m not sure I would call it nagging but there’s a level of distrust I have in the aftermath of a relapse. I think nagging would come from that broken trust especially after a relapse because you feel like you’re starting from square one after all this work. It can feel really defeating.

I just walked in on my boyfriend (18 months clean) using this past weekend and I can’t shake this feeling of wanting to check up on him every 30 minutes to see what he’s doing. It’s hard for me to allow myself to let him sit in the bathroom too long or I have to check on him every time he’s in the shower or in the bedroom by himself. It’s a constant anxiety of wondering if he’s using again or actually trying not to. We don’t normally text that much throughout the day but I find myself texting him more often this week checking in on him.

I know I can’t control him but it is so hard to build that trust back again. I am hoping this is just a slip-up and we can move forward and move past this together. I hope that he wants that too.