The Newcomer's Welcome: What brings you to Village?

welcome
newcomer

#246

Sending out a Warm #WednesdayWelcome to our 27 new members:
If you haven’t yet, please take 5 minutes to: @cynthiawhite @Princess_Tinkerbelle @Honorableteacup @s.kruz @Olive @Mondaine_Chavez @Cpetersen @Honorc12 @Sans @Ali @lais15 @Machorek @BostonMom @KKNPA @AJSunflower @br31 @Teresa @banson @Sparsley @Gracence @Victbury1 @Joanna301 @Missmacc377 @Mary0906 @Rainbow @Manuela_Cooley @mdem629

  1. Say ‘hi!’ on this thread & tell us how the Community can best support you.
  2. Find one question that you feel comfortable to answer! Every question or answer added honestly makes this place a more valuable resource for all .

Few announcements:

  • If you’re concerned about a loved one’s use of heroin, pain pills, or other opioids please check if you’re eligible for our 12-week support program at no cost to you HERE.

  • Also, please consider joining our weekly online group meetup back in full force next week! You can see more details on that HERE.

  • And if you’re ready to dive in you can get the full Village Curriculum which is 9 weekly topic meetups at a 20% discount HERE.


#247

I joined about two months ago. I had been married to a addict for 10 years. He is a “functioning addict”. Meaning he always carried a job, was a good dad, and used “recreationally.” This was never without consequences to our relationship though and I lost myself in the process. As a result of his addictions he lost me. After 14 years of co-dependency, dysfunction, toxicity, PTSD from many drug/alcohol fueled situations, I am no longer in love with him. We had many good years, two amazing kids, but on my journey I can no longer be with him. We are no longer together as a traditional married couple, but are Working on being friends and co-parents And eventually moving separately. In many ways, I traded my soul for that relationship ship. My co-dependency got so bad that at one point I began using drugs and drinking excessively as a means to “control” the situation. Many resentments built up over time. During those years through using and joining in on the party scene, I also got involved with now my best friend and soul mate who Is an end stage alcoholic. Apparently, my journey in life is about breaking my co-dependent patterns. I have always been with men who use. This particular person is my soul counter part and love of my life. After several years of complete chaos I found myself with a more severe addict than my husband. He is a severe, end-stage alcoholic. I was getting sicker in my co-dependent ways. So this year, i had had enough. I got therapy, started going to Alanon, started working on self-care and growing spiritually, and joined the Village. My soon to be ex-husband has not changed his ways. Losing me hasn’t changed him. He’s sad about what happened to us, but hasn’t done anything to fix what ruined the relationship. I’m at peace with that, but would still like to see him clean it up for our kids. My best friend/love of my life is currently in rehab fighting for his life. And I’m here working on loving myself, setting boundaries, and recovering as a co-dependent while supporting my best friend through recovery and setting boundaries and creating a new relationship with my soon to be ex. My current S/O and I are very in love with each other and are hoping through recovery and time we will one day be together. My biggest fear is that he will relapse when he gets out. He’s doing great, he wants recovery, but outside of inpatient is a whole different world and I have to care for myself regardless of the outcome. I’m here for support and to bounce ideas off of people in this community. I have learned a lot but I have a ways to grow.


#249

Thanks for sharing Jess it’s great to have you with us. Keep us posted with how things play out and all you learn as we’re on this path of growth :slight_smile:


#248

Sending out a Warm #WednesdayWelcome to our 6 new members :
If you haven’t yet, please take 5 minutes to: @NoonDawg @Mitsky @Jmille21 @Reggie @zarkgray @cwtv

  1. Say ‘hi!’ on this thread & tell us how the Community can best support you.
  2. Find one question that you feel comfortable to answer! Every question or answer added honestly makes this place a more valuable resource for all .

Few announcements:

  • If you’re concerned about a loved one’s use of heroin, pain pills, or other opioids please check if you’re eligible for our 12-week support program at no cost to you HERE .

  • Also, please consider joining our weekly online group meetup back in full force TONIGHT! You can see more details on that HERE.

  • And if you’re ready to dive in you can get the full Village Curriculum which is 9 weekly topic meetups at a 20% discount HERE.


#250

Sending out a Warm #WednesdayWelcome to our 9 new members :
If you haven’t yet, please take 5 minutes to: @Pasta @Mchrisos @Queensmash19 @CJM @Anthony_Manzo @yaya123 @JR123 @KD_Costello @Polk32

  1. Say ‘hi!’ on this thread & tell us how the Community can best support you.
  2. Find one question that you feel comfortable to answer! Every question or answer added honestly makes this place a more valuable resource for all .

Few announcements:

  • If you’re concerned about a loved one’s use of heroin, pain pills, or other opioids please check if you’re eligible for our 12-week support program at no cost to you HERE .

  • Also, please consider joining our weekly online group meetup back in full force TONIGHT! You can see more details on that HERE.

  • And if you’re ready to dive in you can get the full Village Curriculum which is 9 weekly topic meetups at a 20% discount HERE.


#251

Sending out a Warm #WednesdayWelcome to our 8 new members :
If you haven’t yet, please take 5 minutes to: @Suzy @Cjudy2 @optimisticbear @Rixy @ashleym @Allydaly5 @Dad @Kippy

  1. Say ‘hi!’ on this thread & tell us how the Community can best support you.
  2. Find one question that you feel comfortable to answer! Every question or answer added honestly makes this place a more valuable resource for all .

Few announcements:

  • If you’re concerned about a loved one’s use of heroin, pain pills, or other opioids please check if you’re eligible for our 12-week support program at no cost to you HERE .

  • Also, please consider joining our weekly online group meetup TONIGHT to learn skills and get support! See more details and RSVP HERE.

  • And if you’re ready to dive in you can get the full Village Curriculum which is 9 weekly topic meetups at a 20% discount HERE.


#252

Sending out a Warm #WednesdayWelcome to our 12 new members :
If you haven’t yet, please take 5 minutes to: @medicare @Andreaxoxoxox @nina @Danb @Fee @unique @razzerberrykitty @Wynn @susanhansen65 @Brenda_Allen @Cherielg1 @bqgranite

  1. Say ‘hi!’ on this thread & tell us how the Community can best support you.
  2. Find one question that you feel comfortable to answer! Every question or answer added honestly makes this place a more valuable resource for all .

#253

I am Fee. I am a 47 year old, divorced man with a 17 year old kid. I am in love with an alcoholic. We’ve know each other for 15 years and about 3 years ago her marriage ended and we started dating a little over a year ago. One of the things that attracted me to her was the fact that she partied. I love a party and had been a regular recreational drug user - marijuana, cocaine, psychedelics, and alcohol. Alcohol was never my drug of choice. I’ve always preferred psychedelics and later cocaine which I only started using in my 40s. Since starting to date my alcoholic SO, I’ve gone sober and haven’t used in over 10 months. I’ve never really had a “problem” with my drug use except for a 3 month cocaine binge. . . . Anyways I am now fully sober and I absolutely love it. I’ve never felt better in my life. It was seeing someone I love who is clearly addicted that made me rethink my own use. In order to help her, I needed to take better care of myself. I’ve been reading a lot, attending Al-Anon and AA meetings, exercising a lot but my heart is broken. Other than 3 weeks sober after a horrible fight and a short break-up, she hasn’t stopped drinking. Her drinking has decreased from about 6-8 beers a night to 3 beers a night and an occasional binge, about once or twice a month. I am so tired, always walking on egg shells filled with anxiety. As I walk to the door from the car, I say a little prayer and do a breathing exercise to calm down in hopes that I find a semi sober loved one home. I don’t think I can continue even though I love her so. Over the past year, I’ve experienced amazing joy and so much connection that I feel like this relationship is truly worth fighting for. But have also been told to fuck off and been called a fucking asshole during one of her drunken rages, something that never happened to me before. It is just so hard. Thank you for listening.


#254

Thanks for being here and thanks for sharing @Fee I know a lot of members here will be able to relate this and are at various stages - whether in the thick of things or through the tough times on the other side. Sending <3


#255

Sending out a Warm #WednesdayWelcome to our 17 new members :
If you haven’t yet, please take 5 minutes to: @TT124 @ejane @tlane3 @Justme @teresanelson361 @littlerose98 @Teddy515 @Lolo @Joy_Waddell_Hadley @Lfisher @Brooke_Toomey @Garnet_Druhot-Close @Sally_Annee @Ash.I.11001 @abigailcc @Kimba @Sharonbailey7904

  1. Say ‘hi!’ on this thread & tell us how the Community can best support you.
  2. Find one question that you feel comfortable to answer! Every question or answer added honestly makes this place a more valuable resource for all .

#256

Sending out a Warm #WednesdayWelcome to our 11 new members :
If you haven’t yet, please take 5 minutes to: @ashrae @hope @Cheyannehr @SnowOwl26 @Jkeeler @CorynElise @Swagger @Tilling56-13 @Amber @Casplan @CaptainTCrunch

  1. Say ‘hi!’ on this thread & tell us how the Community can best support you.
  2. Find one question that you feel comfortable to answer! Every question or answer added honestly makes this place a more valuable resource for all .

#257

Sending out a Warm #WednesdayWelcome to our 6 new members :
If you haven’t yet, please take 5 minutes to: @aopatrick1 @acarper74 @Broberts8705 @Nicole @HopefulParent @Pickledora

  1. Say ‘hi!’ on this thread & tell us how the Community can best support you.
  2. Find one question that you feel comfortable to answer! Every question or answer added honestly makes this place a more valuable resource for all .