Welcome here @JWallgren. I’m so glad you feel safe sharing this confusing time with us.
I relate with you very closely. Nearly 2 years ago now, my dad wandered to his neighbors while he was hallucinating, saying some really weird stuff, and they called the cops on/for him. This was the second time the cops had picked him up, and this time they helped me get him (/force him) into rehab. He did a 30 day inpatient program.
I kept a journal during that time because everyday was a rollercoaster (which I would recommend to you, too - it helps keep the days and emotions and facts straight).
At first he was confused, then adamant that he shouldn’t be there, then “OK I know I need rehab, but can we find a nicer one?” then accepting of the program he was where he found sobriety, motivation, & community. But, it was the craziest freaking time! I know the specifics are different in our stories, but I totally relate to your feeling of lost.
Something I wish I had taken more seriously at the time was my own well-being. I would drop everything to pick up a phone call from the center, juggled my work and dad’s business, driving several hours each way once or twice a week, etc. ALL of which I would do again because the program was really beneficial to him (even if he was coaxed into it against his will, kinda) and because I care about him - but in reflection, I would prioritize 8 hours of sleep and ‘do not disturb’ on my phone. And I’d probably drink more water.
I hope these reflections/suggestions don’t sound trite in the midst of what I imagine is a very scary and lonely and confusing time for you and your family, because honestly these little acts of kindness toward myself would’ve helped ten-fold.
Please let me know what you think! I want to help carry your weight, if you’ll let me.