My boyfriend is coming home this weekend from a 12 week inpatient recovery program for cocaine and gambling addiction. We’ve known each other for a couple years, have been dating/romantically involved for about 4 months. He has an apartment of his own, and I have a home. He also has a cat that has been staying with a family member while he’s in recovery. When we talked last night, he brought up some feelings/concerns he had about the arrangement for his cat. The plan was to bring the cat back to his apartment, but he knows we’ll be spending a lot of time together (at my place) and he feels bad for already planning to leave his cat alone for so long. He was wondering how I’d feel about having his cat at my place so he wouldn’t have to worry about leaving him alone. My immediate (internal) reaction was delight; I was happy to hear him say he’d be wanting to spend a lot of time here because I worry about him isolating. That was a thing before treatment. He would isolate to use and spent a lot of time alone in that apartment. I also have concerns though; is it healthy for him (me, or us) to spend so much time together so soon after recovery? Should he be trying to figure things out more on his own instead? Learn to be ok just sitting by himself in his apartment without “needing” to use?
What would be the “healthier” way here? He is also going to run this past his group leader to get some input from them, but I wanted to hear from the village to see what your thoughts are. You always seem to have such helpful insights much love