I know I have been reading that this is to support the loved ones taking care of the abuser but I find it helpful and supportive to read these posts as a user, which I am currently a user, however, hoping to change that very soon.
Lulu, Hi! I’m so sorry it’s been this long since you posted, I just now saw it! I sure hope you are still checking back in here and reading. I myself have thought it would be a good place for users to read and ask questions also. And even give some input on what they (you) would like people to know. I’ve often heard my daughter say I wasn’t hearing her, and I said she wasn’t hearing me. I’ve also heard her say there was so much she didn’t understand about herself anymore and she has reached a point that she doesn’t know if she has a disorder that she feels drugs help, or if drugs has given her a personality disorder. The few times she is willing to talk she has alot of questions. She absolutely refuses to see how her lifestyle affects me in any way. When I point out the many ways, she replies-yeah but that’s because YOU… and somehow puts the blame on me. But, I’ve probably forgotten I did similar in my past years of drinking. I personally hope to hear you comment and share. Wishing you the best of luck in all you do!!!
Oh, so interesting! I’m learning more and more how common this question/consideration is.
@katie I have seen that a lot also. As her mother, I can tell you with without hesitation or doubt, the drugs have most certainly changed her personality. She’s still her. She still has the same personalities that I love about her. Making others laugh, great with kids, smart, loves cats, so many beautiful things. But she has VERY mixed emotions. Angers extremely easy, can become slightly violent, swings in a split second from being loving and kind to acting like she needs an exorcism performed!!! I’m not saying she doesn’t have past hurts that she still hasn’t been able to come to terms with and may have led to her substance abuse in the beginning. But the personality I KNOW is the drugs. But she doesn’t. She does recognize that her mind is different though.
@Shine I have a theory that people who struggle with addiction are kind of magical - I’ve found so many love music, have genius talents, high empathy and love animals, children, the environment - highly grounding elements. Am I crazy or am I on to something?
*Posting as a new questions here.