Husband is a 20 year drug addict with a preference for crack and I dont know what to do


#1

My husband has been a drug user for close to 20 years with a preference for cocaine/crack. He has been in legal trouble the majority of his life because of this addiction and is currently on parole. He relapses regularly, but I feel like he is trying. He tells me he is and that he has never tried to stop before. We have tried medicinal/therapy recovery but most of that seems to be directed towards opiod addiction, counseling, AA and NA, and cold turkey. He has done multiple inpatient rehab programs and outpatient programs but all court ordered or while locked up. I love him so much and things are great when he isnt using (like right now) but when he does, it feels like someone has stabbed me in the heart. He lies and manipulates, he has made me do things I NEVER thought I would do, we have screamed and yelled at each other and said awful things to one another (mainly me to him.) HELP PLEASE