I’m anxious. My 19yo son has been sober for 10 months and has been on his own ever since. He has a history of drug abuse. He has been through IOP, sober for a year then relapse, followed by 2 sober living tours. He’s on his own as we can’t have him living with us. I’m just looking for support/advice from parents who have a similar experience.
Our son has also been sober since age 19 and we just celebrated his 21 birthday last week. He hasn’t lived with us since he left rehab. The best thing for us has been staying connected to him and just offer love and support. The hardest part is knowing it’s all up to him and we don’t have control over whether he stays sober. For him, finding his own community has been what helps him the most, so we encourage and celebrate that.
My thinking is to get yourself to someplace where there are lots of people with recovering family members. They have been there. Ask them. If you arent happy with the answers try another group. Eventually, you’ll find one that fits.
Secondly, keep it as normal as possible. if you can stay focused on what you can do for yourself, you’ll do better than if you exude anxiety.
Many years ago I had 2 young people with new sobriety. There are no guarantees but if you are obsessed about his sobriety he’ll feel it and he doesn’t need extra pressure. I used to obsess about my animals. It didn’t hurt them and I obsessed less about my kids. His sobriety is his business but he might like to see you get well too.