Ghosting by my GF



My former Fiancee’ ghosted me while in rehab.
Said I was a trigger for her addiction.

I am really confused about that!!? I don’t do any type of drugs, Everyone in her family is addicted to illegal drugs.
Last time she was on home leave from rehab, with her family, when she got back to rehab she tested positive for fentanyl,
So I would like to know how I can be a trigger???


Maybe she wants to be your GhoulFriend, :ghost:

Who knows? People are complicated. You sound like a worthwhile person. If you can solve your things and she can solve hers then maybe like the great TV Afterschool Special you can get back together and it’ll be perfect.
hang on…
Fetanyl? … Yikes, No Picnic! from what I hear around the boneyard, and a potential family of in-laws that are all substance use disorder types? … Yikes, No Picnic Plus! Full disclosure- all my family, who I love dearly every last one, has loss and pain and suffers, and handles it poorly some times and better other times.

Who knows? Talk to a professional and find out what makes you tick, that’s the only thing you can really do much about. Or you can take The Course. It’s a lot of learning over a period of time. I liked that because it gave me time to think about what we were learning and then kind of “report back” on how it went. Although I took the course last year I still practice the communication techniques I learned in the class.

Once upon a time I thought people went to rehab and were healed. When counselors would say, “Relapse is part of Recovery,” I thought, “not my son, He has it beat. No siree.” And they were right. I’ve had eight years of personal work to do to help me navigate a whole boatload of things that I was doing/thinking/not doing etc to help myself Regardless of whether or not he chooses sobriety. Who knows? Will it stick? I don’t know.

Good luck to you :four_leaf_clover: I send you well wishes. I hope you find the connection and love you need and want.


Hi @Ronalda, that sounds to have been quite perplexing to hear and painful to endure.

The early recovery period can be very tough, there’s a lot of healing to be done and new habits to be engaged in. From what I’ve seen, it can be hard for people early in recovery to hold space for others. It can be a time where they dedicate all their focus to just trying to get through the day not using. This time passes, but the first year in recovery can still be pretty shaky.

I know it’s been a while so I wanted to check in and see how you’re doing today and how things are going now?


@Thinkstet ‘Ghoulfriend’ too good :joy: thanks for lightening us up here.